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AmadaXtreme

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781

Tuesday, January 8th 2019, 4:13pm

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN GUILTY OF LOOKING AT OTHERS
YOUR OWN AGE AND THINKING, SURELY I CAN'T LOOK THAT OLD?
WELL......YOU'LL LOVE THIS ONE!

MY NAME IS ALICE SMITH AND I WAS SITTING IN THE
WAITING ROOM FOR MY FIRST APPOINTMENT WITH A
NEW DENTIST. I NOTICED HIS DENTAL DIPLOMA,
WHICH BORE HIS FULL NAME.

SUDDENLY, I REMEMBERED A TALL, HANDSOME, DARK
HAIRED BOY WITH THE SAME NAME HAD BEEN IN MY
SECONDARY SCHOOL CLASS SOME 30-ODD YEARS AGO.

COULD HE BE THE SAME GUY THAT I HAD A SECRET
CRUSH ON, WAY BACK THEN?

UPON SEEING HIM, HOWEVER, I QUICKLY DISCARDED
ANY SUCH THOUGHT.

THIS BALDING, GREY HAIRED MAN WITH THE DEEPLY
LINED FACE WAS FAR TOO OLD TO HAVE BEEN MY
CLASSMATE. AFTER HE EXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED
HIM IF HE HAD ATTENDED MORGAN PARK SECONDARY SCHOOL .

'YES, YES I DID. I'M A MORGANNER! 'HE BEAMED WITH PRIDE.

'WHEN DID YOU LEAVE TO GO TO COLLEGE?' I ASKED

HE ANSWERED, IN 1989 WHY DO YOU ASK?

'YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!' I EXCLAIMED.

HE LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY.

THEN THE UGLY,

OLD,

BALD,

WRINKLED,

FAT ARSED,

GREY HAIRED,

DECREPIT,

BASTARD ASKED..

'WHAT SUBJECT DID YOU TEACH '
AmadaXtreme Suspensions
Diamond Park nr2, 86 Jakaranda Str, Hennopspark, Centurion
S25°51'50.2 E28°09'58.2

Cobus 071 641 7947 cobus@amadaxtreme.co.za

Alfortuner

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782

Wednesday, January 9th 2019, 6:35am

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

AJ Venter

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783

Wednesday, January 9th 2019, 8:19am

:D :D :D :D :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Chris

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784

Monday, February 25th 2019, 10:59am

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :spiteful:
2011 Toyota Fortuner 3l D4D 4x4 a/t :thumbup:
Groete Chris 8)

Chris

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785

Monday, February 25th 2019, 11:30am

Die onderwyseres raas met Jannie:" Wat sal jy doen as jy groot is en nog net tot by 10 kan tel?"
" n Boksskeidsregter word, Juffrou.

Ou Jonas, 'n plaaswerker van die Vrystaat pay vir die eerste keer in sy lewe by wyse van tjek.Hy gaan toe bank toe op Bothaville en sê vir die vroulike kassier: “Ek kom haal hom die pay..”Die kassiere verduidelik hy moet net agter op die tjek teken dan kan hy sy geld kry..“Aikona, ek teken hom nie die tjek, ek moet eleke dag agter… agter by die basse bakkie sit, agter by die bakkie ry, agter by die lorrie staan, agter die baas se skape kyk, altyd agter, agter!”‘n Ander vrou verduidelik toe alles weer mooi maar hy wil niks weet van tjek teken nie.Die bank bestuurder, hoeka al die jare nog van Bothaville, hoor die affêre en roep die man na sy kantoor.Hy maak die deur agter hom toe en gee hom een moerse klap.. “Teken agterop die fokken tjek!!” Dadelik teken hy sy tjek en met die uitstap waai hy sy geld vir die kassiere en sê “Eish, Jelle twee, jelle verduidelik somme kak!!! :rofl: :rofl:

Multimiljoener word 50 en besluit om die hele buurt te nooi,vir n groot fees,in sy agter tuin by die swembad.

Dis n meneer van n party: sjampanje,vleis,bier,musiek en als...en Koos is ook daar.

Later die aand,roep die miljoener:

"Ek gee die 1 wat in die swembad spring,en met die krokodil stoei, n miljoen rand.

Skaars kla gepraat,toe is Koos in die swembad.Jy sien net water soos hy stoei met die krokodil.Stryd met lewe en dood,maar Koos klim uit,pap nat en gehawend.

Koos n belofte,is n belofte. Hier is jou miljoen rand..."Hou daai miljoen van jou!, skree Koos...

Verbaas se die miljoener: "Okey 2 miljoen..

Man,ek wil nie jou geld he nie!!..."Al wat ek soek,is die bliksem,wat my in die swembad ingestamp het!!! :D :D
Chris has attached the following images:
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2011 Toyota Fortuner 3l D4D 4x4 a/t :thumbup:
Groete Chris 8)

Chris

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786

Monday, February 25th 2019, 11:35am

Edward Longshanks het Suid Afrika toe gekom om die Boere op te fok.

Hy bring 4000 troepe saam. Hy kom by die battlefield en speck daar in die verte op 'n koppie staan 'n figuur met blonde hare in 'n kortbroek met 'n kam in sy kous. "Rooinek!" skree die Boer op die koppie. "Kom hier jou Engelse moer! I will gives you one helluva gatskop!"

Edward draai om na sy bevelvoerder en sê: "Take 20 men and deal with that Boer upstart!"

Die bevelvoerder doen so. Tien minute later op die randjie van die koppie kom die Boer weer tevoorskyn: "You! English bliksem! Stuur the rest of your rooinekke. I will fok them almal op!"

Edward raak ietwat geirriteerd en se vir die bevelvoerder: "Take 100 men and kill that little guttersnipe!"

Die bevelvoerder stuur nog 100 man oor die koppie om die Boer op te fok. Rukkie later staan die Boer waar as wragtag weer op die randjie en skree: "Hey, you fokken moere. Jou ma se gat! I is just warming up! Come moer me dik!"

Edward verloor sy kop en stuur 400 troepe om die Boer te vermoor. Tien minute later is die Boer weer daar. Sy klere is geskeur, sy hare wild. Dis net snot, bloed en Castle. Weer skree hy op die Britte: "Is dat de best ye can do? You bloody vrotmoer pommies! Come on, come and have a go julle souties! Kom klap me stukkend!"

Edward, lekker rooi in die gesig sê vir die bevelvoerder: "Take the rest of the men over that hill and don't come back till you've killed him!"

Vyf minute later kom een van die troepe al gillende en bloedbelope oor die randjie aangestorm: "Your majesty!" skreeu hy, "It's a trap! There's two of them!" :lol:





Got home from work the other day and gave the wife a travel brochure.
What"s this , she says.
"You know how you always said that you would love to see "The Leaning Tower of Pizza" I reply.
" Yes " she says excitedly.
" Well, turn to page 3, there"s a picture of it there!" :doofy: :blackeye:
2011 Toyota Fortuner 3l D4D 4x4 a/t :thumbup:
Groete Chris 8)

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